“Do unto others as you would have them do unto you”. Bullying can be verbal, physical, and emotional. There are different reasons why someone chooses to practice such hatred; they range from family issues, to wanting to fit in at school, or just to have power. Unfortunately, these actions cause someone else to have psychological problems or even consider suicide.
Bullying someone physically causes them pain even though they may try their best to hide their suffering. Often, the most painful bullying occurs when large groups form; bullies, followers, supporters, onlookers, those who want to defend the person but do not want to get involved. Eventually, someone must stop the fight. Yet, there is also emotional bullying; when someone criticizes another for the way they look or who they are. Emotionally bullied people may endure psychological problems and they do not trust new people that they are introduced to. They still count on the friends that have been there even before it has begun. This also brings feelings of loneliness and they believe no one is doing anything about the harassment.
At a young age, children are judged for various reasons such as race, religion, gender, sexuality, or disabilities. Bullying also begins with problems at home where parents do not pay attention to the child especially if they are going through a divorce and the child does not understand how to cope with this uncertainty. Bullies also feel alone and they wish for others to be as miserable as they are. Some who have been bullied eventually do become bullies themselves due to the anger, loneliness, or vulnerability that grows inside them.
Suicide occurs when no one understands or does anything to stop the harassment. Even after seeing a therapist after the bullying is over; there is a chance the child would not be able to recuperate and begin a normal life afterwards. Those may be the ones who become the bullies. But how does one really surpass the judgment in their life and then contribute back to life, which never gave mercy?
We should pay more attention to this matter and take action. Children everywhere are suffering and most adult figures are turning their heads due to not having experience with the situation to make it a main issue or concern. All these children, at most, should try to understand that they are not alone; we have all been through the bullying at a young age or as we got older, and now we are here standing taller and stronger than ever. If we can make it, anyone can and they will not have to be alone.
In a recent interview with a teacher here at Pomona High School, who would like to remain anonymous, gave us an answer to the question, “How do you think a bully victim feels and progresses with the situation?” His response was, “I think that at first the person/student bullied feels a bit confused and insecure for not being able to handle the situation.” Yet, he returns to how a bully would feel after an intervention and states, “But overtime they realize that it was for the best that they recover.”
Though this type of question is hard to answer; here is a story of a woman by the name of Vienna Blum, who was bullied at a young age and later developed to silence herself and also benefited from the situation. Blum described herself as a “front-of-the-class nerd” just in the fourth grade when she began to be bullied by a couple of boys. It started off as teasing yet, one day, one of the boys held a broomstick to her neck and Blum was paralyzed with fear. Blum’s parents reported the abuse, but the teacher proclaimed the boys had crushes on her and her friends.
The bullying ended that year and Blum felt it to be more appropriate if she made friends with everyone and did not let anyone have an excuse to single her out; though, after college she worked in human resources and her silent voice gave her a disadvantage when making decisions. As a result, her contract was not renewed. Also her relationships did not correlate. Blum was not speaking up on how she really felt due to the fear of being criticized and dumped. Blum then realized she needed to change; she then got into event planning to have to make decisions without doubt and also she began to assert herself much more in her relationships.
These tactics did impact her life positively, and as a result she is assertive, happy, and does not fear conflict by the help of her boyfriend Adam, who she was dating for a year, and to whom Blum told her story to; he understood and helped her with making decisions starting with partner decisions.
This is one good outcome of being bullied yet; this would not be the only way. There are several ways someone can progress from being bullied but they all affect their future. To make the situation simpler, we must end this harassment sooner and help others progress and make life, their life.
Written By: Adriana Salcido
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